The one thing that killed things for my spirit was the lack of sleep and the neediness of our boys. I love them dearly, but oh my word they were, and they still are very needy. Love grows, patience grows, and anxiety grew big time for me. When my anxiety became too great…I would shut down and become depressed. I questioned my worth. I slept more or slept less. It was a battle with the beast of darkness. I wanted to see the light, but at times I just could not. I went to counselors, I talked with my family, I prayed…I took many different combinations of medications over the years. Some years are better than others.
Thankful today that today my grandmother’s tea cup is filled with two little pills that balance me out…for now. I still struggle with insomnia, and I bite my nails on occasion (a life long habit). New situations or unknown outcomes still stress me out. When my children crumble into tantrums…I have to walk away and pray through those with them. My husband is a rock star. I am a back up singer. We work well together, and we “sing and dance” through the daily grind. Life is not easy. Genetics and life circumstances can make things even more complicated.
If you are suffering from anxiety or depression OR both…you are not alone.
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