It’s funny, in the eating disorder world they always say that a girl with an eating disorder is a personal trainer’s dream, and, well, they were right. I just didn’t know it yet. I’m a perfectionist, always have been. I’m sure a LOT of you girls are too, perfectionism is pretty common. I won’t undertake any task unless I know I can complete it and complete it well. I’m a tick in the box kinda girl. That’s how my Dad refers to it. So weight loss became another one of those boxes I wanted to tick. I followed my diet plan to a tee, exercised and trained the allocated amount, maybe even a little more. It’s really cool to start seeing changes, especially when I’d NEVER seen such changes before. But I wanted more, I wanted to train harder and diet harder so I could be even skinnier, I didn’t really tell my trainer this.
It worked for a while. . . but it was strange. . . Even though I’d ticked the box I was still so overwhelmingly unsatisfied. I’d say this is where the disorder began to kick in.
Trigger Warning: Eating disorder (numbers and some detail)